Wait…

Waiting patiently has never been one of my strong suits. I can be kind to others while waiting…I am not normally rude or show ugliness…just impatient. My brain starts short circuiting and I start getting anxious and just want to get things moving.

I admit this to you because I struggle with this on a daily basis. Whether it be…waiting in line…waiting for my boys to get in the van and buckle…waiting for visitors to come…waiting on God …. I must say, I think that one is the most difficult.

I just want  things to happen and get moving…get past all the waiting….

Where do you want me God? My family? Where is our future? Where will we live…what will we do ….and see….?

I have recently seen how driven and out of control my impatience really is.

I’ve been praying that the Lord will grow me up, and replant that Fruit of the Spirit in my heart. That fruit in me has been looking a lot like the dead flowers outside sweltering in the heat of the summer.

Although I don’t know what the future holds,  I know who holds the future.

They are hands that are stronger, bigger and kinder than mine. They are hands that wait on me all the time…waiting for me to listen…waiting for the selfishness in my life to change to servanthood…waiting for me to give not only what is convienient…but to give till it hurts…teaching me to wait for those answers…and be ready to listen when the come.

Being taught patience can be painful and challenging, but I’m discovering how beautiful the process can also be. I am so thankful that God has shown me one of my major weaknesses. Seeing the beauty of life in a totally different light can be both humbling and precious.

Like those wilted flowers desperate for water, they are reclaiming their beauty with a lot of water and some miracle grow…I choose the growth and beauty that comes from patience.

Hopscotching Through Life…

The heat wave that has bear hugged us until we can’t breathe has kept our family indoors most days. Morning time has been outside playtime, and afternoons….well…too hot even to go to the public pool.

Today was more pleasant than our most recent weather, although still a scorching 95 degrees and holding.

We took to the grass and sat in the shade and decided not to let this heat ruin our fun.

My two oldest ran around with binoculars all around the outside, hiding behind bushes…sneeking around…playing spies…

My two-year old and I managed to keep our wits about us as we chose to draw a hopscotch game on the driveway with sidewalk chalk.

I love to watch him jump on the hopscotch path. He throws the rock…it lands on a number and he hops, skips and jump on all of them…not even avoiding the number the rock landed on. He just giggles and loves every second.

As I am often reminded of life situations when seeing my children play or interact…I was one again intrigued in this moment.

As people, we grow into adults and follow the paths laid out in front of us…sometimes we don’t…some of us rebel from the path…go a complete different direction…either way…there are often barriers, hurt, anger, the rocks in our lives that land right where we are supposed to go…and sometimes in places we weren’t meant to go.

In life it’s easy to see big rocks in our path…sometimes they are boulders really..and we avoid them…walk around them…sometimes run…often hide until the rock is gone (we think it is)…and then continue on through life. Even the small pebbles, they may not obstruct our way, but soon, if not moved from our path…it becomes almost impossible to get through…

I’ve learned that it is imperative that we don’t run from those boulders or even little rocks that get in the way. Even small issues can completely snowball into something that changes who we are and how we deal with life and it’s situations.

I’ve spent my life running around the boulders that have blocked my way. Viewing them as a hazard, and avoiding the emotions and irritation it often causes. I was neglecting the need to process it the way God intended.

God knows these rocks by name…He knows where and when they are going to fall.

He’s just waiting for us to talk to Him. He wants us to daily seek Him so that we might be made aware of possible obstacles, and be ready when they land in front of us.

So as my sons rock landed on number six along the hopscotch board….he didn’t think twice..he just jumped…I want to so fully trust in the Lord that I can just jump and know completely that He’s carrying me right through it, no matter the size of the difficulty that lies in my path.

Don’t run away, rely of God’s mighty power…He is our strength and shield…our helper in time of need.

The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts   in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him.~Psalm 28:7